In theory, it is supposed to be a cute and flirty way to tell someone that you’re interested in them, get them to check out your profile and maybe send you a message. They expend time and energy waiting checking her activity dates, wondering if she got that message, if he should send a second one… Approaching women out in the world is like spear-fishing – one at a time.
In reality, it’s seen as a passive-aggressive way of trying to bait someone else into making the first move. At worst, you’ve just sent the wrong message A proper first contact message is convoluted; you want to set certain expectations and convey an attractive image of yourself. It sounds a little cold-blooded and impersonal, but you’re going to want to have a stock first message. Treat approaching women on online dating sites should be like dynamite fishing; you want to toss your messages out there and see what floats to the surface.
like randomly approaching strangers and demanding that they get coffee with you.
Just about every online dating site out there has some variation on this. Too many people spend too much time focusing on one particular girl at a time, developing an online version of one-itis.
Why You’re Contacting Her: You aren’t going to mention anything about her physical appearance.
If you weren’t attracted to her, you wouldn’t be writing to her in the first place, and it sounds like a pick-up line at best.
It’s basically a gently teasing challenge, and sets the tone that you aren’t grovelling for her attention.
What Is It About Her That You Like: Your immediate follow-up; what part of her profile is it that made you click on “message her”.