I had little idea, less prospects, and even lesser interest in anyone from my community.Years and years of identity interrogations, “tolerance” being mistaken as being “acceptance” and just plain ol’ bona-fide racism tend to do that to a person.(Parents, now would probably be a good time to stop by your kids summer camps. After all, I’d seen her profile and saw that she had checked “Reform,” just as she saw that I had checked “Orthodox.” So, clearly, a relationship between us was not something that was going to work out.However, we both had resources that would aid the other in their specific branch of diversity work, and we were more than willing to share the wealth.Shutterstock This article is part of a collaboration between Tablet and Click here for access to comments COMMENTING CHARGES Daily rate: Monthly rate: Yearly rate: 0 WAIT, WHY DO I HAVE TO PAY TO COMMENT?Tablet is committed to bringing you the best, smartest, most enlightening and entertaining reporting and writing on Jewish life, all free of charge.So I dated a non-Jewish girl for eight years, with full disclosure on the table that marriage wasn’t happening before a dip.If I couldn’t find a Jew to marry, then I guess I’d just have to make one.
Dating Sites is a resource for online dating which includes reviews for related apps and sites.It was a story that resonated with me on more than some abstract level of outrage as an advocate for Jewish diversity because I’ve been where Nahmias’s son is. I always knew that I was going to marry Jewish—that part was non-negotiable for me.But just who was the Jewish woman I was going to marry?JOCFlock was launched in 2010 on Tu B’Av—by me—because there was (and still is) something very wrong about how Jews of color are treated once they reach this particular point of the Jewish life cycle, and it desperately needed a solution.Case in point, consider Ayanna Nahmias’s biracial Jewish son who doesn’t want to date Jewish girls because of the bullying and rejection he’s experienced since Hebrew school, and a lack of being able to see himself reflected in his Jewish community.Valentine’s Day is a thoroughly ridiculous holiday.It’s okay, I can say that: I was born on Valentine’s Day.And with that realization, I figured there were probably people in the same or worse position than I was, so there needed to be some kind of structure for all of us. Some JOCs don’t even put up their profile picture to avoid rude comments from site users and moderators alike.And there are horror stories: The kinds where caramel-skinned Jews get told by matchmakers that they’re “too pretty” to marry Jews who are Black; and the kinds when African-American Jews in their twenties are set up with developmentally challenged 40-year olds. Because people didn’t think she’d mind due to her circumstances. I myself had an interesting multi-email, multi-hour exchange questioning my Jewish identity when I joined online-dating site Frumster (now JWed) out of curiosity.Because every Jew should have the chance to enjoy a day of love without being bombarded by hate or ignorance (which is sometimes still just hate only with a better publicist).Yes we’re all part of the same whole, but those parts each deserve to have safe spaces too.