A reader asked: “Any guidelines for safe teenage dating?
”Here are a few thoughts about safe dating for adolescent and parental consideration.
For example, they feel relaxed and comfortable with you.
A warning sign would be if the other person felt worried, distrustful, pressured, threatened, or coerced.
This is probably safer than dating and having no way to reach parents should help be needed or trouble arise.6) On the date, both people, and others present, are substance free.
This is probably safer than ignoring your heightened needs for approval, inclusion, or excitement that can get you into costly relationships. Many years ago a woman I worked with at an organization told me a story about the power of parental involvement in her dating through high school. All the way through growing up he had his eyes on me and mostly this was okay, except when it came to my dating in high school, when it definitely wasn’t, at least not to me. ‘Little darling, I know you do, but this is just what a father has to do.’ And what he put me though was this.
Sons need to be spoken to about safe and respectful treatment of any young woman they go out with, as one single mom did with her son: "I expect you to treat anyone you date as respectfully as you would want your sister or me treated by any man dating either of us, is that clear? It was embarrassing, even humiliating what he put me through when I was going out with a guy. ‘Daddy,’ I’d complain, ‘nobody else, not one of my friends, has to go through what you put me through when I date! I came to call it ‘taking my dates into the kitchen.’ It went this way.
Fourth, do you like how the other person treats themselves?
For example, the dating partner is honest with themselves about their strengths and weaknesses.